I would describe this book as “masochist woman with slightly magical vagina conquers the world”.
Note – this is not a criticism. It’s well written, amusing, intricate, interesting. It’s nice to read a book where people don’t have sexual hangups, which is straight faced and upfront about bdsm (not being silly) while also thoughtfully exploring the implications of a society which incorporates it.
The romance aspect is actually chaste for the most part, because in a world/book where sex isn’t much of a big deal, people by and large aren’t repressed about these things; therefore the people she doesn’t sleep with take on additional significance.
I have no desire to read the rest though because I think the book is complete as is and would not benefit from sequels.